Empathy From The Heart
Understanding another person’s feelings, perceptions, and thoughts is at the root of empathy. Feelings of the emotions of loved ones who have left us can also turn into sympathy, or sometimes personal distress. For someone on the spectrum, it can be filled with emotions that are hard or almost impossible to express, or for us to comprehend. Our grandson Dante sits at the gravesite of his two grandparents, Tony and Pauline Fallico. We who have come to know, understand, and love him have become aware of many of his unconventional responses to many of life’s most complex situations.
We understand that he processes emotion and social cues differently due to his delayed validation, not a lack of feeling. Things may unfold differently and often appear not to be invested, but in his soul, he feels deep compassion, thought, and conviction. Here, he sits contemplating the loss of two grandparents who loved him, praying for them to “come back” or perhaps telling them to “be well”, and that he will meet them in that place called Heaven that he has heard so much about. Maybe he was feeling confusion or a simple desire for their return. Perhaps in his mind, there’s imagery of flowers, the sky, or the feel of grass surrounding him that he is trying to describe for them to feel.
He may be saying, Papa and Grandma, you are my angels, and I still feel that you are watching over me from above. I tell my broken heart that you are still caring for me, and I will remember you, wipe my tears, and thank you for your patience with me and for all the cherished moments we shared.
We all live within a spectrum of empathy that allows us to connect with another person’s spiritual beliefs or experiences. I’m sure Tony, Pauline, and Dante would want us not only to believe it, but to show it.
“Let me hold the door for you. I may never have walked in your shoes, but I can see your soles are worn, your strength is torn under the weight of your story that I have never lived before. Let me hold the door for you. After all you have walked through, that’s the least I can do.
Blessings, dear friends,
Have yourself a good and Godly day. For what lasting value is a good day, if it is not also a Godly day?
