A Cure for Loneliness

Simple and easy exercises to erase the need for unnecessary suffering from social isolation. Everyone is welcome to participate.

This is probably the longest post that I will ever have written, but definitely the most important one. Please read it to the very end, reread it, then pass it on to your friends and “revisit” and “reexamine” it as often as you can. It will change your life and hopefully the lives of our children and the people that you encounter along life’s journey.
If we can establish all of these positive things, we can then show the rest of the world that our Statue of Liberty and the multitudes of American people stand for life, liberty, happiness, truth, equality, the pursuit of connection, and community.  

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          Loneliness not only crushes the soul, but it is linked to strokes, heart disease, and dementia, and if left completely unchecked, it can lead to suicide. It can literally and figuratively break someone’s heart. Statistics have revealed that “social isolation” is as deadly as smoking fifteen cigarettes a day, and more lethal than obesity or consuming six alcoholic beverages a day.

          Yet, there are simple and effective solutions as well as many proper approaches that consistently build connection, trust, and community — three essential building blocks that will bind us together in a very short while. Building a solid community can be as simple as creating publicly private partnerships that can knit millions of people together. Things such as nature walks, songwriting workshops, community litter pickups, and much more. Things that need to be established and built upon with complete regularity.

A majority of Americans have repeatedly reported experiencing loneliness, lack of companionship, or just feeling “left out.” Social isolation kills far more people in the U.S. than murders or terrorists and causes millions in unnecessary health costs; whereas “social connection” can, in time, reduce disconnection from each other and inclusion by fifty percent.

Let’s make a comparison between today’s America and five other crucial, defining “moments” in our history.

The Great Depression was economically devastating, yet mortality at that time didn’t rise but actually fell. Why do you think that happened? Why didn’t we have more deaths from loneliness and despair in the 1930s such as we are experiencing now?
Perhaps because there were more established community institutions such as churches, men’s and women’s clubs and associations, and most importantly “extended families” that buffered the pain, distress, and humiliation of unemployment and economic stress — groups that actively reached out and stepped up to become more of a family at a time of deep distress. The very same could be said for the years following both WWI and WWII.

9/11 brought us together for a few months of connection, community, and extreme patriotism, followed by more years of scattering away from the three things our ancestors rushed into — family, connection, and community.

When COVID hit, it released a virus that caused us to spiral out of control with devastating consequences of a deadly wave of enormous social isolation that is completely out of control, and only because we let it. The time has come, right now, on this day, to fight back and gain control of our strength, our humility, our patriotism, and our children’s future.  A destiny that is filled with love, kindness, and Godliness.

It is not going to be an easy task to rebuild networks that work and are lasting, because social isolation has a strong hold on the many. It is a rare malady whose cure is now fully known, while the cost is relatively little, yet up until this very moment it has become a slow if not seemingly impossible goal to achieve. We are about to change all of that.  

How many more times do we need to hear the phrase “Do you want to be part of something bigger than yourself?” Well, this is where it all begins and never ends. These are a few more of the simple things we can do to begin to immediately produce simple, quick, positive, and lasting results through our heroic efforts;

Sit down with your family at the dinner table as often as possible
Become a mentor and a volunteer and get your children to do the same — let them experience the joy of leading by example
Organize nature walks
Find someone who can’t get out and bring them their favorite food once a week
Put puzzles together with someone
Read someone a book
Take someone to a library, a museum, or a local play. Let them embrace the depth of the arts.
Take a kid fishing
Teach children how to plant flower and vegetable gardens, make a stand to sell their bounty, donate part of their money, to create nutritious meals for themselves, their families, and those in need of a good meal.
Teach them how not to be selfish and that generosity runs deep and will make them a happier well-rounded individual
How to make their bed
Volunteer to teach sewing classes and teach young girls how to make their own clothing. Become big brothers and big sisters — there’s nothing more important than mentoring young people  

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Get a group of retired teachers to volunteer to teach children to write cursive.
Teach young people about the importance of social graces, gardening, starting a savings account and managing their money
Get back into delivering the Sunday papers. Yes, that does require mom or dad to follow them around for safety, and when the route is over, reward them with a great breakfast
Attend a house of worship with them
Teach them the power of prayer  
Take them for a Sunday drive
Encourage children to follow a strong moral compass but make sure to disclose the moral code giver
Introduce them to the classic movies, music, and literature

Above all teach them to love one another, to help those less fortunate, and that despite what they hear elsewhere, we all need one another
Please feel free to add whatever suggestions you may have and send me your thoughts, role models you may want to be recognized, and any great accomplishments of someone you know, along with simple gestures of kindness that you have witnessed.

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Americans are automatized, polarized, addicted, distressed, and are a “lonely crowd.” But for the sake of our happiness and well-being, we must never forget that above all we need God and we certainly do need one another.

I can only hope that what I say now will turn your life around and stand as something you will teach your children before they get on a path of destructive mental thinking that is totally unnecessary. There are three words that hopefully will help how our minds function with positive and negative thoughts and they all begin with the letter ‘P.’

First, every thought we have (positive or negative) begins in the PRESENT moment and is filed somewhere in our brain. If we continue thinking about it, it will become PERSUASIVE. The longer we allow ourselves to think about it, the more PERVASIVE it will become. I hope this makes sense to you. I learned how to practice this by myself and it saved my life — twice. It won’t come easy, but everything that’s worthwhile takes practice and commitment, and I believe it is the best advice that I could give to anyone who believes in the power of “the one.” But in order for it to work you must practice this every day for the rest of your life, and once you get it — never let it go. It’s the only way to rid your mind of negativity and walk the path to mental survival and a life of contentment.

While you’re at it, find someone every day who needs help and help them. It will not only enrich their lives, it will do wonders for you and your brain will love it. The change we need lies within each of us, so let the power of positive thoughts and the wisdom of the ages have their way with your head.

If we can establish all of these positive things once and for all, we can then show the rest of the world that our Statue of Liberty and the multitudes of American people stand for the pursuit of freedom, equality, connection, and community.

Please feel free to add whatever suggestions you may have and send me your thoughts, role models you may want to be recognized, and any great accomplishments of someone you know, along with simple gestures of kindness that you have witnessed.

One more thing;

Always open up your vulnerability to those who witness the storms in your eyes, the silence in your voice, and the heaviness in your heart. Chances are they feel the same isolation and loneliness as you, so if you don’t open up your vulnerability, you won’t be able to let someone in far enough to see and feel the real you.

Blessings dear friends,